inhumanehuman
New Member
"Video Essay #1 - Christopher Cole - 0517895123"
Hey... hello? Is this damn thing recor- oh there we go...damn new-fangled e-crap...I never was good with the pen (or in this case, some strange speaky-box-thing that took me 30 minutes to turn on), but that kook Odd told me I have to fiddle with this thing once a week for ..."visibility"...(I dunno what "like comment, subscribe" means but he was pretty adamant about it)..., and he seems like he knows what he's doin' (or at least he might shoot me if I don't), so here goes nothin':
My name is Chris Cole
My title is the XCOM Slicer Dicer/Professional Cookmeister/Alien Ration Poisoner Extraordinaire/That Guy Responsible For The Awesome Meatloaf on Tuesday; You're Welcome
Today's date is March 1st
Hell of a week here at the XCOM facility. Hell of a week. You know I never formally got a letter of acceptance or anything. Two big bastards in armor larger than Missouri showed up at my home, loaded me into a jet, and hauled me off to this secret base in, well, I'm not supposed to say where we are. Maybe we don't want the Russians to know...meh
After dropping my things off in our new lovely abode, I got the kitchen up and running, whipped up a damn fine meatloaf for the boys and girls of the unit, and made myself comfortable in the barracks. First thoughts: These. Toilets. Are. Awesome. You wouldn't think a place this tight would have nice amenities, but this bathroom is like staying at a Motel 6 or somethin'. It's the little things that help you through the tough times. They are certainly keeping my wits together while I get established, and make peace with the fact that I might actually have to go out there and shoot at these martians.
Anyway, the aliens: They are from Mars, right? They haven't really told me anything yet to be honest. I figure when they need one of those green things either blown to smitherines, or cleaned, filet'd, and chargrilled they'll let me know. Doesn't really matter to me. I'm just looking forward to getting out there and filling some little green men full of large grey lead.
Unfortunately, I never really got the chance to meet any of the fine soldiers (or anyone else for that matter), but I did find my way to the staff watering hold, and put a small dent in the small batch bourbon. Funny how the jukebox skips over and over when the classic R.E.M. song "End of the World As We Know It" plays. Someone should probably fix that. Seems like it could make some of the more skiddish soldiers nervous. Then again, that sounds kinda funny, scratch that last bit about repairing the juke machine.
Anywho, let me stop ramblin' on. Maybe next week I'll have figured out this recorder-thing I'm talkin' at, and I can give some real in-depth commentary on the in's and out's of this joint. Starcrest Out... heh heh, this stupid thing makes me feel famous....
...is thing thing still on?...
...howthehell... there, I think I go-
"end transmission"
Hey... hello? Is this damn thing recor- oh there we go...damn new-fangled e-crap...I never was good with the pen (or in this case, some strange speaky-box-thing that took me 30 minutes to turn on), but that kook Odd told me I have to fiddle with this thing once a week for ..."visibility"...(I dunno what "like comment, subscribe" means but he was pretty adamant about it)..., and he seems like he knows what he's doin' (or at least he might shoot me if I don't), so here goes nothin':
My name is Chris Cole
My title is the XCOM Slicer Dicer/Professional Cookmeister/Alien Ration Poisoner Extraordinaire/That Guy Responsible For The Awesome Meatloaf on Tuesday; You're Welcome
Today's date is March 1st
Hell of a week here at the XCOM facility. Hell of a week. You know I never formally got a letter of acceptance or anything. Two big bastards in armor larger than Missouri showed up at my home, loaded me into a jet, and hauled me off to this secret base in, well, I'm not supposed to say where we are. Maybe we don't want the Russians to know...meh
After dropping my things off in our new lovely abode, I got the kitchen up and running, whipped up a damn fine meatloaf for the boys and girls of the unit, and made myself comfortable in the barracks. First thoughts: These. Toilets. Are. Awesome. You wouldn't think a place this tight would have nice amenities, but this bathroom is like staying at a Motel 6 or somethin'. It's the little things that help you through the tough times. They are certainly keeping my wits together while I get established, and make peace with the fact that I might actually have to go out there and shoot at these martians.
Anyway, the aliens: They are from Mars, right? They haven't really told me anything yet to be honest. I figure when they need one of those green things either blown to smitherines, or cleaned, filet'd, and chargrilled they'll let me know. Doesn't really matter to me. I'm just looking forward to getting out there and filling some little green men full of large grey lead.
Unfortunately, I never really got the chance to meet any of the fine soldiers (or anyone else for that matter), but I did find my way to the staff watering hold, and put a small dent in the small batch bourbon. Funny how the jukebox skips over and over when the classic R.E.M. song "End of the World As We Know It" plays. Someone should probably fix that. Seems like it could make some of the more skiddish soldiers nervous. Then again, that sounds kinda funny, scratch that last bit about repairing the juke machine.
Anywho, let me stop ramblin' on. Maybe next week I'll have figured out this recorder-thing I'm talkin' at, and I can give some real in-depth commentary on the in's and out's of this joint. Starcrest Out... heh heh, this stupid thing makes me feel famous....
...is thing thing still on?...
...howthehell... there, I think I go-
"end transmission"
Last edited: